head dump

any day now

2011-01-26T14:14:00.001-08:00

I'm getting impatient waiting for this baby to come out. I try to think of other things but I end up surfing topics like inducing pregnancy, warning signs, 2 weeks over due. Now I've resort to blogging which no one has done in a long while. Seems like we've all gotten accustomed to short sentences, instant updates, the accepted signs of a society in demand for instant gratification.

Well this mama is impatient to begin with. For every suggestion given to help naturally induce labor, there's a source that says it doesn't work. I get so anxious that I can't sleep at night. The guilty part is that I'm not sure if I'm anxious to meet him or axious that he's ruining my plans at work. Ideally, he'll come ON time or this weekend, which would be perfect timeing for my relief doc to step in and maximizes the time that my sister is here to help. Yes, I know any parent reading this would think I'm crazy for thinking that way. And ideally my baby will never cry and I can easily raise him in my office only two weeks post delivery and he will nurse on schedule.

Well, at least that's the plan.

a new meaning for "MOM"

2010-10-06T14:15:00.000-07:00

It just hit me that I'm going to be a mom. Suddenly that word carries an entire different meaning. It used to be a word I associated with whining, needy, demands. An emotion of comfort, safety and love. Now it's a word weighed with responsibilities, expectations, happiness and apprehension.

spank me

2010-04-12T21:43:00.000-07:00

Study: Spanking Kids Leads to More Aggressive Behavior

Well, I don't know if I agree with that. I was spanked and I'm ok.

After reading the article carefully, this is what I understand from the study. No spanking under 12mo and no spanking more than 2x/mo before age of 5. ah...I see, that's why I'm ok.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/time/20100412/hl_time/08599198101900

2010-03-18T11:50:00.001-07:00

Where have my blogger friends gone? People have stopped blogging and their last blog usually ends with something like "FYI I'm still here, just busy will try to blog more" That statement is worse than a goodbye! That's a complete denial statement because we all know, and records show, that that's pretty much the last blog we'd see for a while. There may be a few intermittent blogs but I think it's more the user checking in to make sure they haven't forgotten how to navigate through the blog site.

hmm.. wow, I'm feeling kinda bitchy today. I received a negative email last night and it's still pissing me off. It's something about how I didn't communicate a point to her, well, dang it, I can't communicate if I don't get a return call! Am I supposed to spead talk to get the message across on the voicemail?

What else is pissing me off? I was just reading through a Toyota forum about peoples opinions on Toyotas. Majority of posts state what they think then makes a clear point to state that their opinion is "just their opinion". why is that necessary to write down? it's a forum, of course it's your opinion, who elses would it be?

People who bitch about useless shit piss me off too. If you're going to bitch it better be something worth my time to listen to, but don't take two minutes of my life to tell me how your entire day was ruined because you ran out of eye liner in the morning and you didn't know what to do, and you got to work late, and now you're frustrated because you have to go to Target to buy another one at lunch because you can't show your face! Are you friggin kidding me? THAT ruins your day? That friggin email from the same person who says I have communication issues ruins a day.. not an eye-liner.

ugh, so irritated, I'm going to finish that 6" chocolate cake I have then go for a sugar high run.

2010-03-11T12:13:00.000-08:00

CBS5 news:
There's a new pill for head lice, but prevention is best.
to avoid head lice in children, kids should avoid head butting.
In other words, no head to head contact.

PROUD

2010-03-01T13:32:00.000-08:00

I'm going to miss the Olympics in Vancouver.
All the coverage and attention in Vancouver makes me proud to show off my hometown.
I love the "you gotta be here" commercial, and the many nice things new articles write about Canadians. We are nice people.

watch the Olympics

2010-02-23T20:48:00.000-08:00

This is the only time I've ever been such a huge fan of the Olympics. It's only because it's in my hometown. I watch it just to get a glimpse of home and it makes me so proud to tell patients "that's my hometown!"

2010-02-01T13:28:00.000-08:00

I'm bumming around online and decided to revisit Friendster. Remember Friendster? I always will, after all that's where I met my husband, through a mutual friend-ster. The site has made some changes with bright colours and a wall just like Facebook. Except everyone's dusty wall is now spammed with porn videos and half naked girls. Then I snoop around to see who is still making updates, but looks like anyone I care about have made their move.

I wonder how many times in my lifetime will I be recreating my profile, from Asian Avenue to myspace to friendster, facebook to whatever is next. It's an interesting way to review your perception of yourself.

2009-12-14T14:34:00.000-08:00

sometimes I get so stressed I just need a smoke.

going solo

2009-11-15T20:23:00.000-08:00

I want to believe that I always get what I want.

I want to believe it so that I'll have no reservations aiming high.

I wanted to work alone and I got it. Now I'm scared shitless.
That whole body sweat in the morning with my heart beating at a 100? It's not hot flashes, not my hot down blanket. I had to be told it's called an anxiety attack. I wake up every morning to an anxiety attack? Here I go... on my own, wish me luck.

It's Vancouver!

2009-10-17T22:31:00.000-07:00

It's nice that so many movies are filmed in Vancouver. Every once in a while I always recognize a location, even if it's not a Vancouver landmark, just the streets, trees and homes remind me of how pretty the city is.

mom's so smart

2009-10-01T10:37:00.000-07:00

i'm stuck doing online traffic school, that, and I'm so irritated at receiving my first ticket after 9 yrs in Cali. I'm surprised at the volume of contents they expect you to read. 5 chapters and over 100 pages per chapter. I'm so ADD I have about 5 tabs going on as I switch from FB, skype with my mom, traffic school reading (paragraph at a time) and shopping. After a few pages I tried to go back to a previous page on traffic safety and that's when I learned they don't let you go back. That's retarded, so once you "continue" to the following page you're expected to have taken notes and be ready for the chapter quizz? I let out a huge "F***" when I found out. Then mom says "why don't you start coping the pages? then the answers will all be there like an open book test" doh....thanks mom and Adobe

2009-09-07T22:41:00.000-07:00

what do you do with someone who lacks accountability? I thought some people just don't know how to admit to their own mistakes, too much pride perhaps. But now I wonder if they even see the mistakes they have made. It's impossible to reason with these types of people.

false hopes

2009-08-07T23:39:00.001-07:00

I thought change was going to happen, but the only thing that's happening is us going in circles.
Nothing has changed.

oh yah....

2009-07-21T22:26:00.000-07:00

SHIT IS GOING DOWN!!

very slowly and in circles

Because I have a stupid in the building.

ka boom

2009-07-16T16:12:00.000-07:00

I'm about to explode.

There's a stupid in the building.
I can't stand stupid people.

$799 for a hike!

2009-07-08T00:13:00.000-07:00

A few months ago the Travel Network had a episode on Havasu Falls near the Grand Canyon. It showed the gorgeous falls followed by the 2008 flash flood that nearly killed 5 people. The Canyon belongs to the Havasu Tribe. Near the evening of the flash fllood a local native gave a casual warning to over 200+ campers at the base, which no one took to heart. A few hours later the water level rose 5 ft and continued to climb till 2am. 5 campers were stranded on one side of the river, climbing on top of trees to save their own lives. Despite the suspense of the recap CB and I decided we wanted to go there, the falls were truly beautiful. We started our research and to reach the falls we have to drive to Hualapai Hilltop 70+ miles away from South Rim Grand Canyon. Guests must leave their cars there and either hike, horseback or helicopter to the village. The campsite is another 2 miles walk away. I thought it'll be easier and cheapest to go with a group but I was so wrong. Most organized tours charge $799 for 3 days 2 nights! They provide transportation from Flagstaff, mule transport for backpacks only, provide all gears and food. but for $799??? You still have to camp and eat camp food!! Cruise ships charge less than that for a week!

Screw that. We already own our gear so we're going to do it our way. 13 hour drive over night leaving Wednesday after work. Then hike our asses down 10miles in 80F+ heat. Carry our own food and water and if we're lucky we'll get to enjoy the falls by 1pm. Final cost excluding gas and food? $70. Where the hell do they charge $799? Even if we hired a mule to carry our backpacks it's only an additional $40.

update in a few weeks.

oh screw me.

2009-07-02T17:52:00.000-07:00

That's it, I'm done. I spent the last four months sticking a thermometer in my mouth, peed on a stick, charted every event of my day, I have a reproductive book that I read over and over again and I'm completely baffled. I can't believe I spent so many years trying NOT to get pregnant just to find out it isn't that easy. I always wondered what the hell those couples were doing taking over a year to get pregnant. Now I know.

sweaty car

2009-07-01T20:26:00.000-07:00

HOT HOT HOT I haven't had A/C in my car for the past two years and it's too expensive to fix. Not sure if I can bear another summer.... can't decide if I should fix it or tough it through another summer and look for a used car next year, or lease a car. CB's found a great website swapalease.com you can take over someone elses lease, some owners even offer a cash bonus!

Till then, I'll be losing weight in my mobile sauna.

True Blood

2009-06-17T20:43:00.000-07:00

current HBO series that I'm additcted to.
Keeps my mind off shit.

It's time for another move.

Just eat it!

2009-05-22T14:42:00.001-07:00

I was craving for deep fried chicken wings after running the Bay to Breakers. It was a HOT HOT run by the way, filled with lots of naked men. They must've really enjoyed the weather.

Anyhow, chicken wings. I wanted some kick ass Chicken Wings from this Chinese restaurant in the city but we ended up at Red Brick Pizza for some "healthy" baked chicken wings instead. That didn't satiate me at all so we ened up at KFC which was even worse. It's been a long long time since I had KFC and it'll be a very long time before I go back. We also tried the grilled chicken which is not good at all. Dont' be lazy, just go grill your own chicken.

Reminisce

2009-05-22T14:35:00.000-07:00

Every now and then I really really miss home.
This time it was the low 70's weather with the cool breeze, blue sky and burst of greenery from the trees. I start to miss the summer days I walked out of my house to take Shaughn out for a walk. The fun midnight runs I take with some friends around Kits beach, then wrapping it up with fresh Segel's Bagels.

Everytime those memories return I always have to ask myself whether it's home I miss, or the simpler life I had.

short visit

2009-05-02T21:07:00.000-07:00

My mom came to visit me for the first time in years. CB and I were quite happy to have her visit our place and my office since she's only seen pictures. My sister, brother in law and cousin came down the same weekend too. The visit was celebrated with lots of eating out and drinking. It's always nice to have relatives down, espeically mom, since I don't get to see her often. Then one by one left including CB for Vegas, suddenly I'm feeling all lonely and missing my mom. It's one of those relationships where I love her, but I'll need a bigger house in order to live with her. Maybe on her next visit our accomodations will be better.

bed to myself

2009-03-27T21:06:00.000-07:00

CB is away this weekend and I get the bed all to myself. And when I wake up I get to turn on the TV and make all the noise I want.

vrooom hum...

2009-03-16T21:44:00.000-07:00

that's the sound of our new Miele.
Our place is going to be so clean all the time because CB is going to vacuum everyday!

I remember the first time I learned of a Miele canister vacuum 8 years ago. My sister B came home giggly with her $1000+ vacuum that looked like a mouse (computer). What ridiculousness to have purchased something so expensive! My other sister and I stood back and watched as she demonstrated the ease of this mouse looking canister with a left click on the mouse to power on and a right click to retract the power cord. Then the ease of lugging the light weight machine up and down the stairs. Oh how happy she was as we watched her vacuum and chatted. The little mouse hummed so quietly as C and I laughed so hard. "Great, YOU can vacuum all the time"

After getting fed up with the pain of dumping water out of our Rainbow CB and I finally bought a Miele as well. Opting for something more affordable we first purchased a Simplicity Cinch vacuum which is sitting in the living room right now, still in its' box. that same day CB found the Miele Calisto for pretty much the same price. We're both happy, this new puppy better not let us down. I expect it to last 20+ years, like my car.

not a size small

2009-03-02T23:29:00.000-08:00

My legs felt a bit weird. I couldn't sleep soundly at night, that pain around my legs... it's not sciatica, I know what sciatica should feel like. This doesn't not feel like some kind of shooting pain down my leg. It's more of a discomfort around my leg, shingles maybe? I'm being overly dramatic.
What is this feeling?? It's hard to describe at first, the feeling is new to me, it's constricting, tight, almost creating a rash at the same time.
oh, I know what it is.
*sigh* my underwear is too tight. I'm not a size small anymore.

Nine Dollars

2009-02-16T14:39:00.000-08:00

It's the 16th of February and I have $9 left in my pocket. I blame Valentine's Day for the rapid spending. Trying to budget myself makes everything seem so damn expensive. But it does help put things in perspective for me, I'm starting to see where all the little expenditures are adding up. Like the Egg tarts I bought yesterday for $1.50 each and the Chestnut cream tart for $3.75 and the Red Bean bun. It wasn't my lunch but I wanted them, and I ate all three in half an hour just to feel horribly guilty about the calories I consumed. I could've saved myself 10 bucks and 1000 Calories if I just didn't step into the bakery shop.

sensitive eggs....

2009-02-14T11:43:00.000-08:00

I woke up a little earlier than CB this morning to prepare some pancakes and eggs for Valentine's breakfast. The pancakes obviously took a little more preparation but it was the eggs that took the beating, verbally. CB likes them over medium, slightly soft and almost runny. I like mine soft and NOT runny, but I'm not that picky. It's amazing how upset some eaters get when their eggs are not done right. CB didn't get upset, but he was sure surprised when the eggs didn't come out the way he likes it. Seriously, it's a difference of 30 seconds on the grill? or 20 seconds? Am I supposed to watch the eggs? time it? what?

Three hundred

2009-02-02T16:30:00.000-08:00

Let me see if this will work.
A year ago I read about a couple that decided to end all spendings for a year. They only purchased essentials and cut their entertainment to a minimum.
Well, I'm on a mission to pay off my credit cards so I'm going see if I can keep my spendings to $300 a month. That excludes gas and 'business expenses'.

I typically charge everything onto my credit card, then I pay this big bill and wonder how I managed to rack up a bill. Everything seems important on that bill, gas, groceries, little things here and there, eating out ever so often. There's nothing extravagant on there but all those line items add up.

Feb 1st is the start date. I have $291 in my wallet now. $9 was spent eating out on Day 1.

Boar Brushes

2009-01-25T19:35:00.000-08:00

I picked up two boar brushes at a spa sale. It's supposed to help clean hair better and spread natural oils down the hair to bring out shine. The brushes are much more expensive than regular synthetic brushes, but I have to say they are worth it! My hair is much shinier.
While I'm on the subject of high prices products, CB purchased Creme de La Mer for my sister as a christmas gift. I always thought these ridiculously high priced skin care products are full of shit. Using expensive ingredients that weren't valid for their purpose. The Creme de la Mer purchase came with two small samples. Those two small samples probably cost $20 each, considering how expensive the full sized bottle is. The samples lasted 4 weeks and it cleared the dark sun spots on my skin! OK It does work, but I'm not going to spend $100+ on a 1ounce jar, atleast not yet.

closet space

2009-01-12T22:01:00.000-08:00

I'm trying to declutter. I have to admit, I'm quite messy. Not to be associated with dirty! I'm just messy. This year is about decluttering, lots of electronic and clothing donations. Get rid of junk mail immediately. Keep everything filed away. Put things back immediately after I use them. Clean regularily.

Part of my decluttering involved reorganizing my closet. I looked around for closet organizers and on picture all these closets look clean and tidy. Then I started to get irritated! In picture this person only has 5 shirts, 5 slacks, 5 pairs of shoes and some sweaters and jackets. That's it!
Stupid advertisement. I'll just store my clothes in a container and put them on rotation with the season.

The best gift to your children

2008-11-15T18:27:00.000-08:00

I take care of strangers and preach about good health. But the people I care about, my family and friends never hear it. So, time to time I'll share them. And by the way, I'll always take care of my friends at no charge. What's the point of having these healing hands if the one's I care about never benefit from them?

Since I'm starting to feel maternal, here's the first bit.

The best gift you can give your children is to take care of your physical health and financial health.

Perhaps you share the same concerns with me when it comes to our parents. I'm always worried about their health and retirement. So, think about how your kids may worry about you.

Our generation is having children later in life, which means our children will bear the burden of caring for us at an earlier age and for a much longer period, as human lifespan is now longer.

Just as our children are beginning to start their own families, building their careers, they may already feel the pressure of your age. I just wouldn't want to place that kind of burden and stress on my children.

Just a little something to think about before you compromise your health or retirement fund for that designer silver pacifier that your baby 'needs'.

Health Insurance

2008-11-12T14:46:00.001-08:00

If you're a healthy individual that visits your doctor once yearly for check ups, there really isn't any reason to purchase an expensive health plan. Pick a high deductible plan eg. $1000 to $3000+ Pick a deductible you know you can afford to dish out ASAP should you find yourself in dire need of emergency care. These plans may cost as little as $80/mo depending on your age, or even as little as $25 through your company. Remember, the cost doensn't end at the monthly fees. There are co-pays as well. When you choose a high deductible plan, choose to see a doctor on a cash basis. Most offices offer lower fees for not having to deal with insurance companies. You can ask for a superbill and submit the bill to your insurance company to help lower your deductible. Even though you're paying the full fee (possibly discounted fee) for the visit, by the end of the year the savings you've accumulate may be more than the higher monthly fees of a low deductible plan + its' co-pays.

I know most people are concerned about the 'what if I get hospitalized'. Once you step into the hospital and stay over night, your bill will most likely be over $1000. If you get the knife or any additional exams it'll be over $10,000 for sure. So here's another element to look at with your high deductible plan. What is your out of pocket maximum per year? and does your insurance cover at 100% after that? I had a plan with a $3000 deductible before the insurance covers a penny of my care. But after I spend $3000 (the same amount) out of my pocket, the insurance covers 100%. Which means if anything catastrophic happens the maximum I have to pay is $3000 for the year. That plan was $70/mo. Compare this to a plan that was catered to someone who requires lots of doctors visits and medication. This plan has a low deductible of $250, covers 80% of visits and drugs and an out of pocket maximum of $7000 then the insurance covers 80% as usual. Imagine if your procedure was $50,000. do the math....

My Car

2008-11-06T18:17:00.001-08:00

With the change in economy my urge to spill my thoughts on my car has now reached a blogging level.
I love my Honda Accord. It gets me from home to work perfectly fine. That car has been with me through SFU, Palmer, LA, Lake Tahoe, Yosemite, Vancouver and back down several times. She's met boyfriends C to N and all the flings in between. She's met girlfriends J to C and feels lucky that no one has puked on her yet. She knows all my gossips and I know her well enough to parallel park her into the tiniest cracks in SF. And though she doesn't look the best, I make sure she runs like a puppy. After 12 years she still gives me approx 33mpg on my daily drives to and from work.

Point is. I never had plans on changing cars. Some say it's time for a new car and I ask why? Give me $300+ worth of reasons every month why I shouldn't continue to enjoy a stress free drive everday. Rocks and scratches may hurt my car but they sure don't hurt my wallet.

I'm going to drive that car till she dies.. which may be another 15+ years, I still see 86 Honda's out there.

loser!!

2008-10-29T20:48:00.001-07:00

I hate him so much I'm about to puke. Stupid, egotistic, insecure, LOSER! You're never going to get anywhere in Life, go back to where you came from.

Costume time

2008-10-27T11:10:00.000-07:00

Halloween is the day to dress like a whore call it a costume.
I don't like it, but some times I get suckered into it.

Everyone's in Greece

2008-10-23T22:25:00.001-07:00

We're headed to Greece for our honeymoon in November. We started planning for it back in June then I started noticing that everyone is going there... three newly weds went there for their honeymoon, then two friends just went there and two patients as well! Maybe I'm just more aware of the country because I'm going there. I can't wait to go away. I'm so sick of seeing CB tied to his laptop and Blackberry.

winded

2008-10-20T16:36:00.000-07:00

5 miles on the treadmill today and I was dripping sweat. Quite pathetic. I've spent the least amount of hours in the gym this year and I have my ass to show for it. One of my slacks is a bit shorter because my ass perks it up. I didn't even know pants work that way. CB laughed at me as I walked out the door "is that supposed to be that short?" wah.... NO, my ass took up some length!

oh, I got a new office management software. I'm so excited!

Missing home

2008-10-16T22:46:00.001-07:00

I'm missing home again. Times like this I wonder how my life would have been different had I gone home right after graduation. But whenever I go back the city feels so small, yet I still get lost. I only keep in touch with a few friends there and most of the time I stay at home with my sisters. Going about the city just makes me nostalgic and sad.

I was in a pissy mood today so I ordered geoduck at a Chinese restaurant with CB. It was pricey, but having geoduck reminds me of dinners I used to have with my family. CB choked when he saw the $65 charge just for the over sized clam. I didn't know it was THAT expensive! I didn't care, I was in a much better mood after he paid for the meal. I deserved it after having to put up with a crappy day.

I need my cell phone

2008-10-15T23:08:00.000-07:00

I called Y today, but not on her cell. She was in Vancouver so I called her home phone, the same number that remains in my memory since highschool. Infact, the only phone numbers that I remember are home numbers from highschool. Though I still remember Y's digits, it has been over 10 years since I dialed them. I started feeling weird and even more nervous when Y's mom answered the phone... "Wei, aunty-ah" I spoke, adding the Chinese accent, I never understood why I did that, I don't even speak Cantonese. "May I speak with Y?" I prepared to give my name and then braced myself to be denied the phone call. Either Y was doing home work or they are having dinner. Instead, aunty spoke sweetly and requested I call back in 10 minutes, Y will be out of the shower soon.

It has also been over 10 years since I had to go through another family member to reach the person I want to speak to. Then I started to wonder how highschool would have been if I had a cell. I just imagine all the late nights I hid beneath the dining table covering my mouth so my parents couldn't hear me. With my cell, I could be in bed talking all night! Sneaking out would have been much easier, no more throwing rocks at windows, no more waiting by the window for your friend to whistle or bark like a dog. It surely would have made meeting up eaiser. All those hours waiting in metro town for friends to show up by bus or sky train would have been spared. Calling my boyfriend would have been easier. ah... cell phones are great, with the exeption that now it becomes expected that you answer or return calls ASAP.

rule of the game

2008-10-07T19:44:00.001-07:00

I made a big mistake. I played the game of partnership before having the rules signed and sealed.
Now I have a loser whining because the rules are not what he expected. crap. I told you to agreee on some rules before we start, now stop crying!

So, I layed out the rules again, read it this time, change it if you want, but don't come crying at me again. I don't want to have to deal with you every time you lose.

10 lbs

2008-10-05T15:33:00.000-07:00

I gained 10lbs since my wedding.
My jeans barely fit and I get that thigh rubbing thing going on. Shit, even my underwear suffocate my thighs. I'm really only 2 lb heavier than my average weight, but I'm bigger and less toned. Gotta hit that treadmill a bit harder. There really isn't much motivation with there's no one to impress.

Asparagus

2008-09-26T21:08:00.000-07:00

mmmm... I love asparagus. but the pee.... eww

no more ....

2008-09-21T21:51:00.001-07:00

I don't want anymore sweets. No more chocolate gifts, no more candies, NO MORE.

too much

2008-09-14T13:16:00.001-07:00

It was just a casual comment when I said I wanted to go out a bit more before I have kids.
I never intended to drink 3 days/nights in a row. I think I'm still hung over. 2nd Sunday here I come.. then I'm done drinking for the month.

How do you know?

2008-09-10T20:00:00.000-07:00

You ever wonder how you always wake up from a car ride when you're close to home?
Is it the change in car speed? getting off the freeway?

How do you manage to wake up just minutes before the alarm goes off?

Half Dome

2008-09-02T13:26:00.000-07:00

This hike was something I have been wanting to do since I moved here in 2000. Finally, May of this year the topic was brought up in casual conversation and a few friends and I decided to train for this adventure. The group grew to about 12+ then trickled down to the final 6 who took their first steps towards a 12 hour adventure.

The plan was to start the hike at 5am so we can casually hike up, take breaks and make it down by 4 or 5pm. My cabin was CB and W.H , we woke up at 5am, oops. That's ok, we'll still be okay.

We picked up the other group of 3, BY, my cousin J and her friend Yadi. We had our backpacks ready with plenty of GU shots, Jelly belly sports, energy bars, fruits and water and filter to fill up at the Merced River.

We were well prepared and started up the trail by 6am. Life was good, I was so pumped with my iPOD in my ear, the weather couldn't have been better and the view is beautiful as always. The trails were clear and I was happy knowing we'd beat the tourist crowd to the cables. By 7:30 we were at the Nevada Falls and Glacier point fork. We took the right trail to wards Glacier Point. The signs didn't mention Half Dome, but I knew we weren't going to Nevada Falls, so it must be the Glacier Point trail. That decision became the death of us. After about an hour, rougly 2.5 miles the trail began to descend. We were dropping elevation very quickly. That just means there's steeper hills ahead to recover the elevation lost. But W.H stopped me "we're dropping too fast". Those words came like daggers, I didn't want to admit it, not after happily running down the slopes to pick up time, but I knew he was right. I shouted at the 4 ahead and they came walking back. The news didn't take long to break, everyone started dashing back. I wasn't sure if it's because they felt pressed for time or just pissed off at me. I was surely pissed off at myself.

We hiked furiously back another 2.5 miles.

Of all the times to screw up on a directions I HAD to do it on a 17 mile hike. We returned to Nevada Falls by 10am. By that time everyone and their grandma was on the trail. Our intentions of beating everyone to the cable was a lost cause. We had already covered about 7 miles and had another 4.6 miles to go with the worst yet to come. We took our first real break at the falls to fill up our bottles from the Merced River, as planned. The increased weight of my backpack immediately took it's toll on me. Fortuntely the next mile was flat. I turned on my iPod and life was good once again, but only for that one mile. The trail began to incline again and it only got steeper. With the increased crowd the trail became dusty and I coughed along the way. Finally we came out of the forested area and the dirt path became granite slabs.

Ahead of us were two large groups of tourits. How did they ever manage getting up here with those shoes that they got on? One by one, like ants, we walked up the stone carved steps along the edge of the mountain. We were probably above 7,000ft at this point. The fatigue and thin air made every step painful. I was really out of shape. We gradually made our ascent 5 steps at a time. The trail was filled with hikers needing to rest on the side. When one sits up, the spot is immediately filled with another breathless hiker. I cursed my foolish mistake with every step. had we not deviated 5 miles, 2 hours!!! I would have had more energy for this shit.

We finally reached the base of the cable. People were scattered all over, resting, some napping, some fueling up. The cable was packed and it took about 30min to reach the top of the cable. It probably would have been faster if people wore appropriate shoes, but better safe than sorry. One slip at the top could possible take the rest of us down to our death. The view at the top was magnificant, but not as pleasing as I expected. I needed to pee, I was tired, the wind was blowing hard and I was cold. After 10min we began our descent.

The descent was painful. I was miserable. We passed by Yadi who was limping with a random branch she improvised as a stick. I couldn't even care to help her. We were on our own. All I wanted was to get back, shower, grab a beer, pop a few pills, eat pizza and sleep.

And I did.

something new

2008-08-24T16:37:00.000-07:00

Everyone is surprised when I tell them how entrenched CB is with the current election. I didn't know this part about him either. He always seem so ghetto. Sometimes I dread the moment my colleagues meet CB with his shaved head and gold metal framed sunglasses, stepping out of his black Jag then breaking a smile showing his new "grills". On rare occasions I'd catch him reading a novel by his favourite author. It's always a new book so I know he does most of his reading in BART. Seeing him with a book always surprises me, he doesn't seem that type. I imagine him more with an auto magazine, not books by Vince Flynn etc. Now, the news is cosntantly on TV reporting on Obama and McCaine. I would never have guessed CB cared so much about this. He even started a blog because he has so much to say and I would not hear it.

With the start of my new business CB really stepped up to the plate. I think his Dentist may have helped a bit. He shared with her that I finally started my own clinic and she advised him to be patient with me. The start of her clinic many years ago consumed her time and cost her her marriage. With that, I came home to a cooked meal almost every night and my biggest fan to cheer me on each day.

just something new i'm learning about CB as we grow old together.

The twins

2008-07-07T15:27:00.001-07:00

I have the cutest niece and nephew in the world. I just got back from Vancouver yesterday and after spending a couple of days with my 16 months old niece and nephew-twins, who I'll refer to as Luke and Leah, I'm telling the world that they're the cutest babies ever. Absolutely adorable, they love to play and will wiggle and dance to music, they crawl all over you and even learned to play catch with us. They wake up around 5:30am and start talking to eachother, really loud, the baby talk is my alarm to jump out of bed and play with them. I love how their eyes light up at the sight of me, then they both start crawling/walking like a stampede and runs me over. They keep this up for 4 hours before nap time. My nap time as well. Kudos to my sister and brother in law. CB and I had to sleep all Sunday to catch up on our missed sleep, and that was only two days worth of baby sitting.

It's up to me now

2008-05-11T19:05:00.000-07:00

After returing from my wedding I went straight into preparation of acquiring a new business. There was much to be done and lots for me to learn. The learning never ends and everything I read and heard about owing my own business was true. Shortly after the office opened my partner and I met up with a personal injury attorney. He's well into his 60's, in great shape and offered several tips through his casual laughter. His favourite tip of all, as he said it many times "the best thing about owning your own business is that you get to work any 80 hour weeks you want." I bumped into another collegue at the gym the other day and she giggled as I told her I still have much to be done. She reminded me to get some sleep. ?? Of course I sleep, or do I? No, I really don't. It's very light sleep, something I'm unaccustomed to. I wake up many times in the night and everytime I wake, I'm fully awake. I check the time to make sure I didn't over sleep then I start rehearsing the things I need to do the next day. I dont' know how long those thoughts last before I truly fall asleep again. The first month, I drove to work with the most excitement I ever felt in years. Now the excitement remains but I'm so tired. I gather up my energy before I walk through the door and act like the boss that I'm supposed to be, bright eyed bushy tailed, full of energy, the "picture of health" as one of my patient calls me. I used to feel that way. Now I skip my lunch work-outs because there's always little errands to be done. There's so much running through my head that I ignore most phone calls except for one particular friend, who might even have ideas that I'm ignoring her. Well, compare to others, bitch, you're the only one I ignore the least.

There are days I feel proud of myself, others days I feel like shit. It's a mix of emotions and a stress level that I've yet to learn to deal with. Thank god I love what I do, I can't imagine puting up with this stress over something I feel mediocre about.

I have to give thanks to all my friends and family through this period. I've received so much support, encouragement and help that it really made things so much easier. I'm incredibly touched with everyone's encouraging words and knowing they're ready to help. CB's been incredible as well. He's been doing most of the cooking and cleaning at home and making sure I eat. We haven't spent much quality time lately, luckily he's a man and not emotionally needy. If the roles were reversed I think I'd bitch about lack of attention. It also works out that CB's got a project at work that he's incredibly busy with.

Time passes fast though. Quarter of the year has already passed and now I need to make sure the office does well the second quarter. It's such a crazy race. And I know it'll always be like this.

the stress diet

2008-03-12T20:10:00.000-07:00

I can see why some don't eat when they're stressed.
I bought this new practice. It drains me. It's exciting but it consumes me. I'm constantly thinking about it, I can't sleep because my mind won't stop thinking of it, I barely eat, I have no appetite and strangely, I'm not hungry.

It's consuming ME.

a sick couple

2008-03-01T22:54:00.001-08:00

It's been years since I've been this sick.
I had a slight sore throat Tuesday night. I didn't think much about it.
Then Wednesday morning CB and I both woke up saying "i'm sick" with headaches, achy body and later that night both with fevers. We spent all day Thursday in bed, I felt like we were incubating germs in our bedroom. It's Saturday and I feel better but I'm completely congested and I can't breathe through my nose. I haven't spent this much time in bed in years. It's actually kind of nice.

communication pet peeves

2008-02-19T19:34:00.000-08:00

I have certain expectations when it comes to communication.
Most of it comes from the way I was raised "When adults are talking, children are not to interrupt."

Here it is:

1. When I'm holding a serious conversation with someone and that conversation does not involve you, please don't interrupt, especially when you're shouting your opinion from 5 ft away. Why are you listening in anyways? If you want to be part of the conversation, come closer and read the body language to see if you're welcomed.

2. When I'm on the phone don't talk to me. Dichotic listening is not my specialty. I often miss part of my conversation and what you said was a blur as well. Call my name or get my visual attention. I'll politely stop my conversation to answer your question with full attention. If your intention wasn't to ask me a question and just wanted to shout your opinion because you're listening in on my conversation then go back to number one.

3. If you walked into a conversation and you felt you missed something, naturally you'd ask "what happend? what were you guys talking about?" If no one answered, it means no one wants to share with YOU. It's not that they don't want to share, it's YOU they don't want to share the conversation with. Don't embarrass yourself further and stop digging in, you're just making everyone uncomfortable.

I need to clean

2008-02-01T20:12:00.001-08:00

Is my need to clean some kind of housewife instinct that's taking over me? As I ate my lunch all I thought about was how I'm going to spend my Friday night cleaning the house. I want to throw away all that crap laying on our dining table for the past year. There's a box of wedding material that I can't wait to throw out, but I want to complete our thank you cards first then burn that wedding stuff like it was a some kind of bad nightmare. I want to vacuum the house and scrub the floor. I spent 30min scrubbing down the shower door and now its' soap scum free. I want to buy a dozen toothbrushes so I can scrub between the tiles of the bathroom wall and kitch countertop. Then scrub out that mold sitting by the window still. I want to pull all my clothes out of my closet and refold them so they look neat like a store shelf. I want to forbid any future purchases of DVD's because we do not watch them more than once but once they're in the house they do take up space forever. I want to throw away that old pile of unopened mail that I can not throw away because it's not mine and I get nervous watching it sit there, haven't you watched "House of Sand and Fog"? Open your mail!. I still have to fold that laundry, find a place for our SCUBA gear and possibly re-organize the storage space. I want this place CLEAN and it seems like the first step to keep it clean is the rid the cause.. and the cause is HIM. The one who's not going to leave my side till I die. wah.... I'm going to be cleaning forever, like a fuckn maid.

How does it feel

2008-01-17T19:43:00.000-08:00

How does it feel to be married?
The same.

We lived together for a year before our wedding day. I feel the same today as I did yesterday, and the week before the wedding and the months before that.

It's been over a week since the big day and I still get nightmares of it. It just shows that I spent too much time planning for it.
I'm very glad the day is over and more pleased that the pictures turned out beautifully. I would need those pictures and videos to remind me of what I missed.
Back to normal life. Today I got out of bed at 2pm. That was great. I hardly sleep past 10am, but my goal was to wake up when i felt like it, and 2pm it was.

Suddenly without a wedding to plan I'm feeling anxious. I'll focus on work again.

From The Brides View

2008-01-15T16:55:00.000-08:00

It was everything I didn’t expect.
The week was tortuous and fun all in one. Everyday leading up to the day of the wedding was packed with activities leaving us little time to sleep. Despite crappy weather we still did our tours, the highlight being the Tarsier monkeys. They’re so ugly they’re cute. Everywhere we went we traveled as a group. At times it was a logistical nightmare, but once settled it was fun to have everyone there. We dominated every place we went.

The unfortunate part was that people were getting sick. It almost seemed everyone got sick at one point. I felt really bad that guests were falling ill. But I tried to remind myself that there’s nothing I can do about it and it really isn’t my fault.

The day before the Wedding:
By the 5th I was exhausted. Exhausted from all the shouts and fights CB and I went through and continued to carry on in the Philippines. Little details remain unresolved because we couldn’t talk about wedding stuff without raising our voices. Thousands of things ran through my head but I couldn’t verbalize them. I never felt so frustrated, angry, stressed and exhausted all at once. All while trying to maintain a pleasant composure. We transferred to Shangri-la on the 5th, CB took off quickly to run more errands. I relished the moment I set foot on Shangri-la’s beach. I laid there for only an hour before I started getting the jitters and had to hit the gym to run off the anxiety. It may be a small thing, but when the attendant approached me and handed me an icy cold towel 10 minute into my run that made everything better. I liked that towel service.

At night the MOH and I cleaned a bottle of red while we scurried around the hotel suite wrapping up last minute details. I hit the sac at 10pm, tired again and caught myself thinking of ingenious ways to excuse myself from the next day’s event. But I couldn't, could I? This isn’t some Friday night birthday party that I don’t want to attend because I’m too tired. This is a wedding that spun out of control. From a small guest list of people dear to my heart, to people I don’t know, didn’t invite and subsequently some didn’t show up either. A list of should’ve, could’ve ran through my head. If I could only turn back time and did things differently. This is my party, why am I so miserable?

Wedding day:
The usual morning make up and dress up was fun. Once the camera crew showed up the girls and I lit up for the lenses. It’s great when no one is camera shy. The weather was warm but everything felt hot under my dress. After our morning shoot, I was feeling miserable again. Tired, hot and anxious and a dress too tight to sit in. Arg….. Then it came time to travel to the church, now that’s the fun part. A Sunday wedding squeezed between two masses. Everyone got there at 1pm for the 2pm wedding, I waited in the car with my bridesmaids, a lousy A/C in a very uncomfortable dress that had to be unzipped and I still couldn't sit straight. I was dripping in my dress and feeling grumpy. My bridesmaids probably took the worst of the hit. All my frustrations were directed to the one's immediately next to me... them. I was worried about the guests standing around the church feeling as miserable as I do. CC did the run around sending messages between the bridal car and the other guests. It may sound no big deal, but no one wanted to step out of the car into the heat. Tine had everything ready in case shit hits the fan, make up, food, hairspray, Tide to go.. you name it, and the MOH simply had to swallow the emotional beating coming out of me and fanning my fanny, yes, my legs were dripping hot.

Message came to the car that the public did not leave after the 1pm mass because they wanted to see the 2pm wedding. Thought it was some celebrity wedding since Sunday weddings were few and far in between and the Bishop was officialling it. I ended up getting so nervous, my walk down the aisle was a quick march. Who were all these people? The church was packed, I mean PACKED with people STANDING!!! The coordinator apparently lost her bearings as well and forgot to have the flower girl walk down. I’m disappointed. Everything was chaotic to me. I was simply happy to step out of the car and was ready to fly down the aisle and get this shit over with.

The ceremony was interesting. I’ve never sat through a full Philippino Catholic wedding so I wasn’t sure what to expect. Perhaps CB is lucky that I never sat through one, otherwise I would have never agreed to it. It was an hour long with a communion, at which I dropped the F bomb at the altar when I turn to see a long time of people waiting to receive communion. Then the Bishop told our relatives that one of the fruit and flower offerers was “the most inappropriate, scandalous, sinful girl in the group ….” It was my cousin D with her cute black bubble dress reaching only mid thigh with killer legs that even made me gasp! I guess before that incident, our reader got an ear full for not wearing a shawl over her halter dress. We already warned her to wear a halter vs a strapless, but I guess when you’re sexy, you’re sexy regardless of what you wear. Yes, we’re a sinful bunch.

It’s so wrong, but hearing that brightened my day.

My brain was still fried stepping out of the church but at least the stress lifted. Not sure why I was stressed to begin with, but it laid over me like a dark shower blurring my day.

The camera’s started snapping away as we walked out of the church. The doves were released.

Looking back, the ceremony was tiring but it was the most special part of the day. I'll forever cherish the memories of holding my parents arms down the aisle. When my dad told me that he didn't mind the heat once he saw me. He held my hand tight, I squeezed back, I miss him too. I'll always remember our voices echoing through the church as I shared my vows with my sunglass wearing husband. So ghetto.

The reception was fun for me, we had native dancers lined up, a kick ass band that everyone raved about. Name a song and they played and sung it well. It didn’t matter which genre, they were a great cover band. We performed our first dance, a waltz that we barely practiced, my footing was everywhere, I was happy, buzzed and still a blur. But I didn't mind that we were all over the dance floor dancing to our own beat. The cake was not served, there was plenty of dessert aside from the cake, so I bit into my wedding cake, something I’ve always wanted to do. A big fresh cake and it was mine to destroy.
There were games.. that I didn’t even know about. Which I think people enjoyed, but I can't remember, I was running low on fuel.

The day felt like organized chaos which others felt was fun.

By the end of the night I was drunk and the groom was missing and half the crowd was gone because that's apprently what Cebuano's do.

I return to my room to find the groom over the bowl. I guess that's how the wedding night ends.

That's it?

2007-12-28T10:08:00.000-08:00

a whole year's worth of planning and the day is arriving already. A whole year's worth of bitching, fighting, pseudo break ups, time, stress and this is it? If I could only put more effort into other things in my life.

I'm actually quite happy this day is approaching is will be over with soon. I'm tired of being consumed by wedding stuff. It got boring after a few months. The problems arising from a stupid events coordinator at Shangri-la was becoming a regular expected routine. Aside from my personal coordinator, everyone there seems so incompetent in keeping accurate details of their clients accounts. Either that, or I'm the stupid one, naive of their game and simply unaccustomed to the shadiness of the Philippines.

I''m ready to have normal conversations with people again, though I'm expecting a few weeks post wedding I'll still have to answer wedding stuff. I just wish people had some more originality to their questions.
But for now.. a status update.
Contrary to what everyone thinks, and I do appreciate the gentle kindness in their tone and the look of warmth as they ask me, but I am not..

No, I"m not nervous. Nervous about what? tripping down the aisle? Marrying the wrong person? j/k.
No, I"m not stress. If I am, it's no more stress than anyone would express under the same conditions when people make last minute changes on you. It is more annoying or upsetting than stressful.
I'm busy, because my stupid boyfriend (just got demoted) left in a rush and forgot a shit load of stuff and errands for me to finish for him. Though I'm sure he finished his fantasy football with flying colours and is all well prepared for his fantasy basketball.
Yes, I'm excited, I'm going away for a two week vacation.
Yes, the wedding is all planned, whatever remains unplanned will just be. The day will come and go as is. There's just small projects that take time, keeping me busy, but that's about it.

I'm not sure if other modern brides feel the same, but I've been living with my husband to be for the past year. There really isn't much of a difference once I am a married woman. I still am the one cleaning the house, he still will be going out, and no i'm not changing my name. He'll have to really bring home the bacon for that one. Seriously, people will think I'm mexican if I changed my last name.

ugh... i'm ready to leave work. I've been on vacation mode for a while already.

1.5 more weeks

2007-12-26T17:09:00.000-08:00

I can't work anymore.
My mind is elsewhere, things to do, list of items to pack, last minute gifts to buy, my nails done, eyebrows threaded, clean the house... what else???

I'm already on vacation mode.

3 more weekends

2007-12-07T15:40:00.000-08:00

That's all I have left. Three weekends to go to

Christmas parties
shop for gifts
create my table centerpieces
buy and distribute alcohol (by the way, if any friends are reading this, if you have extra space for a bottle of your favourite liquor to bring over to the Philippines, let us know)
create the slide show
practice slow dancing like we did in high school, because we didn't get a chance to take dance classes and any kind of slow dancing we've done so far would just not be appropriate in a wedding.
budget ourselves for the trip
pick up miscellaneous items, like make up, shoe pads etc.

well, now that I laid it all out, it doesn't seem so bad. Just a lot of work. So for the remainder of this month I'm going to be a hermit to get things wrapped up.

CB and I are both getting excited about this trip. I think both of us are more excited about being over seas with a big group of friends than we are about the wedding. The wedding is kind of getting in the way of our diving plans. I have to miss two days of diving for the rehearsal and the ceremony itself.

I can't wait to eat during the reception too. Everyone says food at Shangri-la is very good. I've been advised that the couple doesn't eat much during the reception because of all the things going on. Apparently, they don't know me well. I'm debating if I should order an extra cake just for myself, but they already have a buffet table in addition to the wedding cake.

Thirty days remaining.
A years worth of planning and arguing all for one day.

Grow up asshole

2007-10-31T14:15:00.000-07:00

Last weekend CB and I went to a Halloween party at our friends' loft in the city. We had a great time, everyone was in costume, drinks kept flowing and there was good food cooking in the kitchen and our friends DJed upstairs. All was perfect till the next day. CB realized he left his jacket and his favorite shades in the pocket at the loft. No problem, send off an email to ask the host if he's seen it. Our friend didn't find it and even sent out an email to the list of guests to ask if anyone picked it up by accident. It's been a few days and no response.

Is is possible that who ever has it is still hung over and not aware? I highly doubt it.

CB's been so upset these days, those are his favorite glasses, and he just got them too. I like them a lot myself.

so here goes...

You asshole, you have it and you know it.

What's fucked up is that we're all friend here. Or at least friends' of friends. We're all mature working adults and you're stealing someone else's jacket and shades?? You went to a friends' party and steal from their house? What, you can't afford to buy your own shades that you have to steal a friends? What else did you take from the house? How cheap can you be? How low, selfish, pathetic can you get?

What a jack ass. I'm posting a picture of the shades, maybe someone will notice a "friend" sporting new glasses this week.

I don't understand....

2007-10-30T15:40:00.000-07:00

so, Paypal defaults to your last name if you try to add another credit card. I understand that for security reasons. I just had some other questions on what I should do since I made another booboo with cousin Meow Mee's payment. I call Paypal and the person with the accent, it's always someone with an accent, asks for my phone number and name. ###-###-#### Head dump. oh, I mean, cousin Violet. "and who am I speaking with?"
"this is Head dump" I already said I was HD, so I figured I'll just stick to it.
"for security reasons I can only speak with cousin Violet"
rolling eyes
"fine, this is cousin Violet"
"you're cousin Violet?"
"Yes"
"I thought you just said..."
"well, how woud you know anyways? you can't see me. I just have a few question.."
"Mam, why would you have an account open in someone else's name?"
"It wasn't my intention. Could you tell me how can I cancel a payment that I made through a wrong funding account?"
"Is this account yours? blah blah blah...."
"Can I speak with your supervisor? just transfer me"
pause....
supervisor
"How can I help you?"
"I just want to know how I can cancel a payment I made...."
"and is this your account?"
"yes it is my account"
"due to Paypal security we expect that when you sign up.......(lecture lecture)"
oh, she wanted to hear my story? I gave it to her starting from the moment I called cousin Meow Mee for her billing address and CC number at 11:30pm and how it ended up with me getting tired by 11:50pm and never used PayPal before and made some mistakes... oh yah, bitch wanted to know why... I gave her my PMS version of why. I am PMS ing =)

she quickly answered my question.

how does one justify the security to speaking to the account owner? how do you know who you're speaking to? stupid people. It's not like I was asking personal account questions. I could care less if they have time to waste, but don't waste mine.

PISS ME OFF

2007-10-30T11:33:00.000-07:00

So, last night i'm making some payments via paypal for my cousin's Boracay trip. 3 separate payments. I've never used paypal before, but I figured it can't be hard.
so, I'm chatting on the phone with my cousin who's spilling last year's gossip in lightening speed. I'm half laughing half typing and some how managed to pay off one balance with one card that belonged to cousin Violet. I go on to make another payment and now Paypal wants me to sign up. how annoying, another account to deal with. so I sign up, still talking, somewhat tired by 11:50pm and I'm about to make Miss Violet's next payment but now Paypal wants an account verification? Mean while, my paypal account is named miss violet with my email address because it's her credit card that I first entered and my last name is suddenly Miss Violet's! Fine, I gave Paypal my account number. All is good, I make another payment. Miss Violet's payments are done.

Next is to pay cousin Meow Mee's trip. simple, just add her CC in the account, pay, and all is good.
Of course not. stupid me.. Paypal won't give the option to change the last name. I can understand that for security reasons. But there must be a way for me to add another CC with a last name.. what if businesses allow different cards? right? right?????

doesn't matter, so tired and I didn't want to figure it out.

Today I decided to set up another account for Meow mee. Then send the payment through "her account" but stupid cat gave me the wrong billing address for her CC. 3 payments and it is taking me over 4 hours time to do. friggin annoying!

I'm not stressed

2007-10-24T16:22:00.000-07:00

I hear wedding planning is stressful. But CB and I aren't stressed. It's time consuming and we get into a shit load of fights that made me want to leave him over and over again. But by the end of the day it's back to our usual routine and all is well.
This whole process really helped us get to know each other. We learn how each manage projects, what our own idea of what team work is. We learn what efficiency means to each other and our flaws in organizational skills. We learned how to fight meaner, louder, harder and how to quickly push each other's buttons. That's not a good thing, but we learned it.

With a little over two months left I'm starting to feel excited about the whole trip. It's not the wedding that excites me, but the idea that my family.. all 6 of us will be together again. It's been over 7 years since we've had a family photo with all 6 of us. The philippines is going to be a really fun trip, with so many of my friends and family there this wedding is more exciting than stressful.

We have a wonderful coordinator, her name is Edith Laurino. She seriously saved our whole planning. So, when I say I'm not stressed, that's because Edith is taking on the bulk of things. For a period she was more concerned about the wedding than us. We had to step it up because I think she was getting annoyed by the lack of response from us.

We nearing the last stage of our planning now. Nearly everyone has booked their flights and hotels for Cebu and Boracay. Any stragglers that want to join us later can join with ease. The Air and Hotel was probably the most difficult to organize but with that completed everything else is a piece of cake. Cake.... I'm going to eat a whole layer of my wedding cake.

Eels and Mantas and Sharks oh my

2007-10-16T15:52:00.000-07:00

CB surprised me with a birthday trip to Maui this past weekend. He rented a condo which made the whole trip feel like home away from home. The condo is on the first floor, with a patio that faces the ocean. I'd walk out to the beach every morning with my cup of coffee and imagine this is the way I always wake up. The beach is always quiet and I'm usually the only one there. It's like my own private beach.

We only had 4 days there but we sure did alot and ate alot. We walked around Lahaina and had burgers and fries at some restaurant that Norvin likes. It's been a while since I had junk food, being on a wedding diet and all. That dinner marked the start of a series of fatty meals. We finished dinner with a nice walk and macadamia coffee pie ice cream. After that the plan was to go home, chill at our patio and enjoy the sound of the waves. We both ended up falling asleep on the lounge chairs.

The next morning we got up early for our boat dive at Molokini. I was excited and nervous. It's my first dive since being certified. No instructor, just my buddy, CB. Our first dive was 60 Ft, I started to get really nervous when we had to descend. I haven't yet made a successful descent without crashing into the ocean floor. I do not want to crash 60Ft to the coral beneath!

Somehow I managed and the dive was amazing. We saw Eels, one Manta Ray and several sharks. Those were three creatures I've been wanting to see! It made the whole vacation perfect.
Thanks CB

My dress is coming!!

2007-10-02T08:48:00.000-07:00

ok, now i'm getting excited. I did the one thing that all the bridal stores, magazines, online consultants and other brides told me NOT to do. I purchased a gown online. It was nearly half the price of what the stores were selling it for and the ebay store seemed pretty reputable. It was also comforting that every time I called I was able to reach a live person, Julie, and she typically replies to my emails within a day or two. The store also sells other bridal items. Julie told me the dress should arrive at their store the last week of September, they'll inspect it then ship it out. Sure enough, the dress arrived on time.

Last week I received the UPS tracking number and it in Illinois today. I check it everyday watching it traverse from New York towards me. I'll be in total bliss when it arrives in perfect condition and with some luck.. fits perfectly requiring minimal alterltions.

3 more months

2007-09-30T13:44:00.000-07:00

3 more months and 6 days before the big day. CB still hasn't purchased his plane ticket yet. I might just have to get married without him. One leg of his flight is not yet confirmed, so he can't purchase his ticket.

Everything else surrounding the wedding seems to be going smoothly. Or, we simply aren't that into it. CB just got his new Halo game. That, in addition to football occupies most of his time. I'm shopping for my out-gown and the perfect pair of shoes. I'm now given a reason to shop and that is not a good thing. Girls should not be given reasons to shop, it becomes an obsession.

Next weekend we'll be certified for SCUBA. It'll be our first time in open water. The purpose of this certification is so we can enjoy diving when in CEBU and Boracay. The number of people headed to CEBU so far is 35. That doesn't include the folks coming from Taiwan. It's going to be crazy fun. But for now, we're just enjoying our weekends with nothing to do. Actually, we're sitting at home shoppig online. CB just bought two regulators for diving, one for each of us. =)

Wedding Diet

2007-09-12T20:53:00.000-07:00

Ok, goal is to lose 8 pounds.
What am I doing to reach that goal? Pretty much starving myself and working out. I'm giving up running distances for the next few months. It's going to be 3-5mi runs with Pilates or Yoga.
I'm cutting back on sweets. Best to just cut it out, but I'm not that diciplined. I just ate half a moon cake and a slice of Home made Lemon Merengue Pie today. Patients brought them in, so I couldn't resist. Plus, it's rude if I don't eat it right?

Wedding planning is picking up again. Now it's all about booking rooms and flights for guests. We finally narrowed hotels to two vs the 6 that CB planned at first.

What else is happening.... started my SCUBA class. We'll be doing our first confined dive next week. I can't wait. It's been a very long time since I've picked up something new.

Going camping at Cathedral Lakes this weekend. It'll be the first time CB and I trail camp. It's not a difficult hike but it'll be really cold at night. I'll try to post some pictures.

I have a sleep Disorder?

2007-08-07T20:38:00.000-07:00

So, this was supposed to be a funny story, but as I read more of my disorder online, it doesn't seem so funny anymore and it's probably dangerous in many ways.

Last night I dreamed that CB was being stupid and teasing me in the exact way that pisses me off. I told him to stop, and he didn't, then I got pissed and threw a few punches at him. Little did I know these punches really took place. Hey, the bed is big enough for a punch kay? I would have never guessed that the three punches landed on his ribs. Sadly, the only reason I knew I punched him was because I woke up from a sore fist. Poor me, I had hurt myself while punching CB in his sleep. He woke up and started bitching at me. I felt realy bad but being only semi-awake, hand hurting and pissed at what he did in my dream I told him it was his fault for being such a JERK (in my dream).

Last week I did the same thing. Smacked him once 'cuz he was teasing me in my dream. Actually, I must confess. I was so pissed that I woke up from being so angry and found my arm right above his body ready to pound at him. Instead of pulling away, I just let it fall....on top of him. oops.... He didn't make a sound. Interesting, maybe people don't feel pain when they're sleeping? 3 seconds later "OUCH" Or maybe they just have a delayed reaction.

This disorder is called RBD, REM sleep Behavior Disorder. To spell it all out.. Rapid Eye Movement Sleep Behavior Disorder.
This disorder can be dangerous. Like the time my sister dreamed that she was kicking a dead body then woke up realizing she was kicking me! Fortunately I wasn't injured.
Another time I woke up finding my arm over my cousin Cathy's face! In my dream I was hammering something then my mom stopped me in my dream and that's when I woke up.
I could have really injured Cathy if I had come down with that kind of force!

In some instances people with RBD tie themselves up in desperation to not hurt anyone.

"Sleepers with RBD sometimes injure their bed partners. Some people have been known to leave the bed, run into a wall, run through a window, or run down the stairs. But RBD activity is usually confined to the bed and the surrounding area. "

It's a disorder, not an excuse to beat up my bed partner. Perhaps CB should stop teasing me 'cuz I'm obviously getting upsetting dreams about it.

I'm busy

2007-08-06T13:42:00.000-07:00

On Mondays I stick around the office during lunch time. I run a few errands online, do some light reading, blog. It's my own time. Sometimes co-workers come and chat and that's fine, as long as it's not about work. But what picks my ass is when I'm glued to some webpage, obviously reading something that I find interesting and someone starts to have a full on conversation with me! Do I ignore them? Of course not, I smile, nod and provide a short acknowledged response and quickly continue my reading. Most don't seem to read the body language well. I don't see why it's hard to tell that when I barely looked at you to smile and I'm still looking at the screen, I don't want to be talked to. With CB I'm much more rude. I simply ignore his comment and respond by leaning towards my screen and begin reading out loud. On a pissy day I'll begin to read out loud before he completes his sentence. That's pretty obvious right? Now how do I translate that to other people? I should bring earphones and pretend I can't hear them.

Make me Beautiful

2007-07-30T15:23:00.000-07:00

This weekend I went on a make-up binge.
Friday night I met up with a friend of mine, M, who works at Sephora. It never fails that she brings out some goodies whenever we meet. This time she brought two extra bags for my other friend and cousin Tiffany (it was Tiffany's birthday). That's rather sweet M, considering she's never met Tif before. After some drinks I made it home at 1:30am. Tired as hell, but I still wanted to check out my new colors. The following night I spent over two hours with D playing with our new make-up. It was fun, it felt just like highschool again. The next day we visited an event by Taylor Pham, she's a new make-up artist with her own line of colours for Asian skin. I was excited to meet someone who could do Chinese eyes. So far the only make-up artists that have been able to do Chinese eyes, or specifically my eyes are bridal make-up artists. Everyone else you find at the cosmetic counter don't realize that the fold in my eyes makes the color disappear! They always tell me to open my eyes after puting on mascara, I'd warn them that the lashes will hit my lid and smudge. So certain of their own confidence they'd politely command me to open my eyes. Fine, bitch. I open, look up and SMUDGE. that's right.. clean it off girl.. and do it ALL over again. I've long given up asking for make-up advice from those girls.

I walked out of Taylor's event with another bag of goodies. Eye shadows, lipstick, fake lashes....
Excited about these new colours I even woke up early to apply some day make-up :)

I don't put on a lot, but just knowing I spent some time taking care of my appearance in the morning makes me feel good about myself.

Invitations

2007-07-26T11:29:00.000-07:00

Has any couple ever fought so much that they don't even want to marry each other anymore.
I sit across that guy that I'm supposed to marry and I swear if he fell off the planet right now I wouldn't shed a tear. With all the stupid things buzzing around us, we forgot to formalize the invitations. Sorry folks, instead mister and miss, you are now just ___(your name) . Only the married folks are Mr. & Mrs. Is that so bad? I mean, I read so much about formality etc.. as if people will frown at me for sending out invites w/o addressing them properly! whatever.... they're printed, and they're going out as is.
e

Joyful Letter

2007-07-25T14:07:00.000-07:00

My ex-wedding coordinator was from a company named Joyful weddings in Cebu. They're a pretty big company with several coordinators. The owner is Esmie, but they handed me a lady named Hannah or stupid would be better..

We signed up in February with Hannah, and by June, I just couldn't stand Stupid anymore. Either she didn't like working with me, or she was really stupid. After waiting 3 weeks for a response from my last email, I got sick of waiting and decided to bitch out to the boss....

Dear Ms Esmie,

It has been 5 months since we signed our contract with your company to be our wedding planner. CB and I were excited to start planning our wedding. We had a few things we were able to do on our own, but many others that required a planners knowledge and expertise.
My expectations of having a full wedding planner is that the planner will indeed, plan the wedding. We feel that we've been the ones planning the wedding, and come to think that we paid you. We should be the one who should be getting paid if this is what wedding planning is in Cebu.

So, my question for you is what have you planned for us since February?
Have you completed any of our wedding tasks? When I say complete, I would like specific examples of how you discussed with me on choosing a vendor, suggestions you have on vendors, creating a contract and signing it etc..
Some other things that I find disturbing is that you’re planning my wedding, but you know nothing about me and you never asked. I actually had to tell you the information fearing that you’ll screw up the wedding because you don’t know anything about us.
Do you know the size of my wedding party?
Do you know what kind of wedding I want? Simple? Extravagant? Elegant? Romantic? Intimate?
what's my wedding budget? Aren’t you supposed to work this out with us in the beginning as you mentioned in your contract?
Do you know if we have all the documents required for a Catholic wedding?
What is my color motif? Did you ask or did I had to tell you?
Have I purchased my gown yet? I know we mentioned that we would take care of this, but as my planner, aren't you concerned whether your bride has started planning this yet?
Have we started looking into invitations?
Have you ever initiated to make an appointment to chat online?
Of all the things we said we were going to do, what have we done?
Have you reviewed our contracts with vendors? Did you notice that we managed to negotiate the price of our reception to 2007 prices, when YOU told us that it CAN NOT be done? how is it we managed to do something from 1000miles away, something you should be able to do as a professional and experienced planner? You are supposed to negotiate as agreed in our contract and you failed poorly. who's side are you on?
I ask questions about vendors and it takes you 2-3 weeks to return my emails. Don't you know who your vendors are? don't you know their packages?
I often need to send repeated emails to get a response from you (2-3 weeks later)
And when you do reply, your answers are incomplete. Sometimes, you don’t even answer some of my emails, for example when you sent me several pictures of floral arrangements I asked you which florist created which flower arrangement. How am I supposed to know who’s good, which florist I want when I don’t know who created what?
I asked if the vendors have websites, and you didn’t reply to that email either.
I feel like I've hired a bad secretary instead of a planner.

You are professionals and you deal with vendors all the time, I would expect a professional to know the answer immediately from experience and the resources you have. Even if you don't, it shouldn't take almost a month to reply. If you're busy, at least let me know.

When you quoted me prices for flowers and make-up. How can you provide a quote when you don't know what I want and how big the wedding party is?
I increased the flower budget by 20,000 and asked for some decorations and you tell me the decorations will be additional to my budget. That does not make sense. I just gave you a higher budget to work with.
I asked if we are on schedule. You said we are and I should relax. We still have 6 months. But you guys work so slow that just to choose and plan flowers takes over a month! Trying to find laces for my dress was never complete I had to give up on the idea. We had to take over the Reception negotiation because you were unable to negotiate.
What makes you think we still have plenty of time when you don't even know what we want in our wedding?
Do you know if we want entertainment in our wedding? and what kind? how many? do you know where to find them? will it fit our budget?
Can my wedding favors be made within a month? or should we start looking into it now? Or was it your plan to tell me that it CAN NOT be done and I should settle for something less, just to make your life easier?

Your service has been awful and has created more stress.
We would like our deposit back, but most likely you will not agree to that.
We are terminating our contract. I would suggest you wave the additional fees of termination, as you should equally feel you have done a poor job.
.

Sincerely,
CB and Headdump

I got the check!

2007-07-09T17:34:00.000-07:00

So in continuation of messing around with Ms. "I want to buy your gown" I agreed to the buyer that I would refund the excess money that she sent to me in Cashiers check. I didn't think she would send me anything but..today, I received her Cahsiers check written in $5000 delivered by FEDEX. $500 is the maximum limit before a check is witheld by a bank for clearance. Now, I have this fradulent check in hand. A FEDEX account to send the money back to her and a name and address to deliver the check to. I'm so tempted to send over a 200 pound box of crap, may be some garbage, anything just to piss them off. Unfortunately, they have my work address and phone number and I'm not up for putting my life at risk. You never know what these people are capable of.

I just told them the bank is witholding the check and I'll get back to them.

craigslist Cont.

2007-07-02T14:24:00.001-07:00

It's shit like this I'm talking about.. ..I JUST recieved this email. (READ previous post first)

Hello,
i am not in a good state of mind to tell you this but i think you will have plight for me and understand me. I got a bad news yesterday while i was about giving your info to my finance house, i was informed that, my dad had a serious accident and he is in COMA now. The shock of this news affected me badly that, while i was giving your info to my finance house, instead of $300 to be written on your check, $3,000 was written on it and it has been sent to your address already.
I hope i can trust you with my money and i hope you re trustworthy too and i will appreciate it if you can send back the remaining fund to me via western union money transfer and i promise that, i will also compensate you. Please do get back to me and let me know if you will be able to handle this. Thanks and i will be waiting to hear from you soonest .

craigslist

2007-07-02T13:54:00.000-07:00

There's something fishy about people surfing through craigslist.
A few months back I posted our room for rent and we got over 10 emails from people claiming they are female, ages 25-28, providing information on height, hair color, new job title in the area and an immediate request to remove our ad and accept their cashier/money order check. Then the conversation goes no where. They just continue emailing about how they're going to send the money over and please reserve the room.

Then I posted my sisters old wedding dress for sale and the same thing happens. Lady wants my contact and I give it. She asks it again, says she'll pay more than what I ask for and goes on and on about how she's going to handle the transaction blah blah blah.. I sent 3 email out and gave up after. What's going on? Are these people expecting me to volunteer my bank account number because I'm so excited they're willing to pay immediately and MORE than what I asked for? Are there really people that stupid out there to have given their account information to have kept such scams alive?

Or did I just get suckered into having useless emailings with people.

My run around the neighbourhood

2007-06-11T14:16:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a disappointment.
I woke at 8am and began my mental preparation for my 20mile run. I wasn’t looking forward to it considering the furthest I’ve ran in the past month has only been 10 miles. A month before that was 15 miles. But I have some catching to do, so I was determined to pull this weekend warrior routine and just get this run over with. I had my normal breakfast of peanut butter and jam toast with a cup of coffee. An hour passed but I still felt tired from the day before, so I read the remaining pages of the Ultramarathon Man by Dean Karnazes. A solid theme remained throughout the book, run with your heart. Which is true, I love running because it’s my source of outlet. All the negativity that bothers me just seems to disappear after a run. But during my run, any negative thought slows me down (unless they're angry thoughts). The "I can't, I'm tired etc.. " is negative. The "I'm going to kick my bosses butt" is angry thought.

At 11am I started to get changed. I will do some stretches and loosen up my left calf and hip that seems tight. I won’t run at noon time when the sun is at its’ worst. I’ll aim for 1pm and I’ll start hydrating myself now. The weather is not too hot and it should be cooler where I’ll be at. I started to clean my camel pack but realized it’s dirty and I need to change the tube. There’s some nasty green slime in there.

At 1pm I took off towards Lake Merced. Plan is, park at the lake, run down Ocean beach and back, that’s 12 miles then do one and 3/4 laps around the lake to total roughly 20 miles. I made a pit stop on Peninsula Ave to pick up a few bottles of water. Since I can’t use my 1.5 L camel pack I’ll have to hand carry a 750ml and do a refill at the car.
The wind was growing stronger and it seemed to have blown my motivation away. I made a U-turn and drove back to El Camino and headed towards Foster City. I’ll just run around that city. I’ve always wanted to find the path that loops around the whole city. I have no idea how far that run would be, but I knew it wasn’t going to reach 20 miles. In fact, I should just park at home and run there. Such a lazy ass.

1:45pm I’m parked half a mile from the Hillsdale overpass and I begin my run Northbound. ‘Shit, I need to pee. What should I do? Gosh, I’m full of excuses. The urge will pass. Maybe the bladder will reabsorb urine. Does the bladder do that?’ I started to back track in to physiology.. what cells line the bladder and if absorption is possible. It didn’t matter though, the liquid was swooshing around my bladder creating a constant stimuli to do what’s natural. I didn’t have luxury to count on the probability of a re-absorption theory. To my right the path is lined with city hedges about 3 feet tall, its’ separated by a narrow dirt path then lined by beautiful hedges taken care of by the home owners of Foster City. I could jump in there and if I squat low enough, and remove my bright blue cap this may work. No, I’m not desperate enough. Who lives in Foster City? I can count 5 friends and I know where they live. How awkward to call your friends so you can sit on their toilet with your sweaty butt. I wouldn’t do that, besides, if I had to make a detour I may as well hit a public store. The urge is growing and it’s damping my run. I have to soften my stride to lessen the jarring. I’m reaching the 92 overpass and I see two thick pillars supporting the bridge. Oh gosh headdump, BE A MAN!! There’s a lady in her 40’s wearing bright yellow walking about 200 ft behind me, but who’s in front of me and how far? I dashed up to the pillar, turned off my iPOD and I made it out well in advance of Ms. 40’s approach but barely clearing the scene of two cyclists from the opposite direction. Aye Headdump, the things you do.
My run following my brave attempt was great. Despite the wind I made it to my favorite restaurant, Joy, with still half a bottle of water left. So I took a few big gulps thinking I have plenty to spare, just to see that those gulps left me with less than ¼ of liquid! Damn HD, why do you do shit like that? I don’t know how much longer I have to run. The remainder of this route has absolutely no shading. Actually the whole trail doesn’t have shading. I was starting to heat up. It’s probably another ½ hour run? Can’t tell, I’ve always driven around here. Well, water is easier to deal with than needing a washroom. If it gets really bad I can knock on someone’s door for tap water. It can never be as bad as the time I ran in 90deg weather with no water. The stupid things I do. My stomach started to cramp and I had to walk. Salt was flaking off my face and arms. I felt so sick I had to wave some cyclists down. But no one stopped because they were all going so fast.. I obviously made it no problem, but that was a big lesson for me.

I reached my car with no water left. None in my bottle, none in my bladder. The whole run felt like some ordeal but I had a feeling I didn’t run as far as I thought. I may be thirsty but my muscles could take me much further. Only an hour and half passed. That’s about roughly 9 miles? That’s less than half of what I was supposed to do!! What a disappointment. I have 6 weeks before the SF marathon. I’ll let you guys know how that goes.

aerial view of Foster City

Kids

2007-06-04T14:03:00.000-07:00

I’m surfing through facebook adding friends that I haven’t met since high school. These are people I haven’t seen for over 10 years. Their pictures come up and most of them proudly display photos of their wedding or kids.

I don’t know why it should still surprise me. The fact that most people are getting married or having kids has hit me and passed already. But still, just this Saturday while spending an afternoon at a friends’ housewarming the place swarmed with infants and toddlers and I had mistakenly thought the kids belonged to the hosts aunts and uncles or something. They were all children of friends.

Then on Sunday we went to a baptism followed by a reception. More kids! Loud screaming kids. Some starting to walk, some running. Some run and scream, it's a team of mobile surround sound stereo system featuring: scream as loud as you can.

I smile and laugh.. oh how cute. How else are you supposed to respond?

Last night I passed out at 9:30pm and got up today at 7am. That's a good 9.5 hours of sleep. I'm still tired. I can't imagine how mothers deal with kids. If I have kids, I'm going to build a sound proof nursery room. screw the investment on Winnie the Pooh decor and get some good solid sound proofing walls.

bad english

2007-06-01T11:49:00.000-07:00

This is what happens when you send out emails late at night, very tired.

Dear Hannah,

CB and I have a few things we hope you could start looking into.
In addition to the flowers. I'm thinking of going with Pink Flora. Could you ask Tita Pinky if we has any ideas for flowers to match blue and espresso colour motif? Please take pictures and email them to me. I'm looking at setting the flower budget at under 50K. Currently I have no preferences for flowers. But I would still like to see them first.

We also need a Mandarin speaking translator. Could you please help us find one?
We'll also be need some form of transportation for our guests.
Do you know who the cake maker is for Shangri-la? Is there cake good?

finally, do you have any pictures of Wenwen Zaspa's work? If you don't have any, I'm sure s/he has somek, please ask him for some so I can take a look.

thanks much

Headdump

more lost items

2007-06-01T11:39:00.000-07:00

I don’t understand how things disappear. I can’t find my camera. Where’s my camera?
The last time I used it was in Vancouver and I can’t remember where it went after that. Did I bring it back? WHERE AREYOU??

In desparate search for this camera I spent the whole day cleaning the house. It was more organizing things than cleaning. Cleaning would require pulling out our wonderful Rainbow vaccuum, putting on those yellow gloves with a sponge and cleaning spray in each hand.
I didn't clean. I threw papers away, re-folded my clothes, put away my winter sweaters and pulled out my T-shirt. Went through all my luggages hoping I may have left the camera in there and somewhat organized our little bookshelf. Camera is still not found. I'm feeling so unlucky lately.

Water Taste Test

2007-05-19T13:26:00.000-07:00

I had to do this test. I've always liked the tap water in Vancouver. It tasted sweet to me. After walking home from school I'd head straight to the sink, turn on the faucet and drink right out of the tap. This was my smart way of not having to grab a cup and wash it after use.

Since moving here I've been drinking bottled water or filtered water. Sometimes it's $0.39/gallon, sometimes it's $5/bottle.

Water: it's Free or it can be $5.99/750mL

I wasn't tempted enough to try the $5.99 water from Mount Expensive but I chose the ones below.

The test: Not your scientific double blind study of course. The best I could do was use my talent of being forgetful. Labeled the bottles 1-5, labeled cups, pour and put the bottles away from sight. Norvin was the true taste tester.

Volvic- my favourite. It's hard to describe the flavour of water, as they're not supposed to have flavour. This one tasted clean.

Crystal Geiser- This one was clean tasting too but not as smooth, if that makes any sense.

Smart Water-I like this one too, couldn't tell much difference between Smart Water and Volvic

Arrowhead- this one's ok, it actually has a flavour to it.

Evian- This was nasty, maybe it's the bottle but without the taste test I never realized Evian tasted this bad.

Filtered tap water- This was CB's favourite. :)

goodbye to a few more items

2007-05-14T13:15:00.000-07:00

My car got broken into a few weeks ago. Those guys jimmied my drivers and back passenger window. I was able to see the scratch marks. I don’t know why they picked my beat up car. I guess it is the easiest car to break into, compared to the Porsche in front of me, the BMW to my left and Jaguar to my right. That just pissed me off (again). Standing outside my driver’s door looking at the mess they made inside my car staring in disbelief, wondering how could this happen to me again. Why my car? Farewell to my Maui Jims, you served me well for 5+ years. I’m not too pissed because I used you so much and scratched the hell out of you that I don’t mind getting a new one. But with the morning sun blazing into my eyes, I still miss you when I’m on the road.
So long Oakley’s, you fitted so well around my ears and nose and helped me through one marathon and a few half marathons and 10K’s, but your lenses were quite the disappointment since I first tried you on that I spent my first running hour with you in complete regret of purchasing you on FINAL SALE, NO RETURNS. With you gone, I now use that as an excuse to run indoors. Lastly, my glasses, you were such a hit when I first got you. Everyone loved the frames and you made me look smart. But now with you gone, I can’t see at night, I can’t see the signs in the grocery aisle, I can’t see period.

The wires to my car alarm were all snipped. AAA did not hesitate to replace the alarm and fix up the windows. I kindly asked if they could just give me the money to compensate for the items they don’t cover. What good does an alarm do anyways? Has an alarm ever helped anyone? Of course, AAA preferred to fix my alarm instead. Stupid people.

Homebody

2007-04-11T16:36:00.000-07:00

I have this complete lack of interest to go out. My ideal Friday night is the chance to cook something decent without the rush to clean and wash up so I can hit the sac by 10:30pm. Saturday mornings I want to sleep in and watch TV in bed. Then go for a run in the afternoon and then passout till dinner time. Cook, Eat, read or watch TV then sleep in Sunday. Not very exciting. But if feels so good.

Family Politics

2007-03-26T13:36:00.000-07:00

CB and I sent out our save the date postcards a few weeks back. I figured a few people might miss the postcard and mistake it as advertisement, which is essentially what we're doing. We're advertising our date! Even the mail man knows and the people at the post office knows.

I have to admit, I was a little lazy when it came to calling up my aunt and uncle to get their address. Since they live close by, I figured it would be nice to take them out for dinner and introduce them to CB. (correction.. introduce CB TO them) My laziness continued and I received that scolding phone call sooner than expected. "Headdump! why didn't you send a postcard to aunty? Everyone was on Skype yesterday and all the other aunties got it but her!" "That is very disrespectful, I say Headdump is a goodgirl, I don't know why she forget, why did you forget? and why did you make it into a postcard? some aunties thought it was advertisement, and there's no Chinese on there! They don't understand it, it looks like a Christmas card"

sheesh, I was just trying to find an affordable way to make an announcement, something more than an email.

moving along

2007-02-23T13:50:00.000-08:00

bad week.

I couldn't wait for Chinese New Year to come. This year is supposed to be great for DRAGONS. This year is good for anything that requires dealing with people.. such as relationships, business ... um, pretty much everything isn't it? When do you not deal with people? That's the problem with fortunes, they can be so vague and stupid. But I still believe them.

So with last years forces still working against me, CB and I just found out that a Manila TV personel, ???Montenegro?? decided to get married for the second time and took the booking off our hands. That's just F-ed up. I can see why they'd choose to accomodate him and his 400+ guests but now we're left with the smaller ballroom, or to just change the date. I'm not sure I want to be stuck in a hotel with another wedding party blocking the beach and ballroom. We're still debating on what to do.

some good news..The wedding bickering has finally stopped between CB and I. The bad news...It took one big public argument in a restaurant and a dramatic display of temper that I'll never forgive myself for to finally calm us down.

good news...My dress is being made by Lorymer, CB's cousin. It's good in a way, because it's out of my hands and there's no point worrying about it. Problem is, the guy never checks his emails. What are you doing with my dress buddy?? He came highly recommended from his relatives, but it never occured to me to ask him if he even wanted the job!
It's ok. I've got a back up dress.

bad news.... we've got ants in the house. Those ant traps never work. They don't even crawl into those things! It gets worse everyday, now they're all over our pantry!

arrr.....

gown shopping

2007-02-01T18:54:00.000-08:00

I thought wedding gown shopping would be fun. How can it not? I get to shop and try on pretty dresses and feel like a princess. But then I discovered that I can't just walk in to a bridal salon and shop, I have to make appointments. So in preparation I flipped through magazines and checked out some designer runways to find dresses that appeal to me, but I kept in mind that I don't have mile long legs and I will not be walking down the aisle like it's a catwalk. Regardless, the first time I tried on a dress I was floored at what a bustier can do for the body. That, plus cut of the dress... check out those curves! Damn, I'd have to say I look pretty damn good. But what's up withe the price? $3000-$5000+ WHAT?
Not having a clear idea of what I want, every dress looked nice except for the price!!
I checked out David's Bridal too, which has less pricier gowns, but the material is not the same. mmm...That silk charmeuse sure felt nice.

Now I'm stuck trying to justify spending that much on a dress that I'll only wear once. Of course it's my big day and it only happens once. But does anyone really remember what the bride wears? And what am I going to do with that thing the day after? The sentimental sales lady will tell you to preserve it for your children. One day it could become their "something borrowed".

I highly doubt that will happen. Now I'm banking of having a girl? A girl who will be my size and have my style? Would any of you want to wear your mom's dress?

I can't, I can't justify the cost, it's just retarded. My other option is to have Lorymer, CB's cousin make the dress for me in the Philippines. The idea is nice, to have someone in the family make the dress. Not so nice if the dress should arrive ill-fitting and well, ugly. Fashion in Asia is just not the same. Sadly, I'd have to say Taiwanese people have the strangest ensembles.

hmm...maybe I should be carried to the chapel in a Chinese bridal chair.

still planning

2007-01-24T22:40:00.000-08:00

holly F*** we've been "discussing" every night,
this is really picking my ass

another night:
-we need to decide on a location-if we keep stalling we're never going to send out save the date cards and people need to know exactly when, to take time off.
-well we need to factor in cost and stuff
-forget about cost first and tell me what you want(repeat 'one night')

a different night:
-have you called to check availability?
-well, have you decided on a place yet?(quick repeat of 'one night leading to a repeat of 'another night)
-how can we not worry about cost?

I won't even begin to write about what happened after that. Let's just say we've both developed a sudden talent for sarcasm and quick come backs.

Tonight
-Do you want to send pictures as thank you cards?
-No, our thank you cards are part of our invitations, it'll cost more to make separate orders blah blah blah I'd rather spend the money on making our guests who've travelled far comfortable than something people may lose or throw away blah blah blah..
-could you stop being so long winded

then I got the LOOK

oops
heh heh..that wasn't a smart comment on my part

The end before the beginning

2007-01-24T21:37:00.000-08:00

Wedding planning aka catalyst for arguments.

So many things to consider, so many people to please. Everyone has an idea and everyone wants an input. I watch these people speak Tagalog. I hear churches, hotel names, so and so's my flower girl.

-who?
-do you want to be a flower girl? or bridesmaid?
-no, she's too old, she'll have to be a bridesmaid.
-Headdump, show S0&So the dress you picked out for the bridesmaids, show her which one she's wearing.
-what dress?
-the brown one.
-of course, lemme see if I can find it again in the magazine, you asshole.

I don't think I'm being a bitch when I say I don't want some girl I've met 3 times my whole life to be my bridesmaid. I don't even care if the mention of her was just out of courtesy because your relative is in the room. The fact that I had to flip through pages to pretend I found the dress just boils my blood.

Sitting in a room dominated by the majority. I need back up. Back me up CB or you won't sleep well tonight.

on one night:
-I want you to have the wedding of your dreams.
- =) I want it in Boracay
-except for Boracay
-???????##@??????
-The church has to be in Cebu.
-I'm sorry, what did you say? a wedding in my dream?

Visitors

2006-12-20T16:57:00.000-08:00

The only reason why the house ever gets cleaned.

Halo

2006-11-26T22:42:00.000-08:00

I've never been a big fan of video games. Never had that hand eye coordination. I think it all started with Zelda. I'd go over to Winnie's place in Grade 7 and after an hour I'm happier being a back seat driver.. "turn left, you've gone right already.. open THAT box!" . Then my uncle brought over Atari, I actually liked the games we had on that then the machine broke because my cousin Felix got pissed on a level and decided to do some real damage. Then there was Tetris and Bommerman and Bombliss. ooh those were my favourites. Street Fighter and Mario Brothers? mmm.. no, what's up with those combination moves?? couldn't stand it. A few years ago I got a good laugh with Super mario cart and that was the last of it.

This past weekend CB pulls out Halo, I had to spend a day just so my man doesn't walk around in circles with his head down. CB had to partner with me just to keep me alive long enough to develop a learning curve.

Now I can walk decently, the aiming is very off, but I'm starting to like it more.

CB was so patient teaching me the buttons and all that good stuff. He even waited for me to walk up to his player (which took a few min) after I crashed my hover thingy because driving THAT is worse than walking. After 3 hours I got a little addicted and tired. Then he said to me " when I get the new game, just ignore me at night time, I'll be playing till I pass out"
well, can't I join you?
"no, I'll never improve if I play with someone who's..... not as good as me."

I miss you

2006-11-20T14:36:00.000-08:00

It’s easy to tell CB I miss him, it comes out without hesitation when the feeling comes to me. I tell my family I miss them too, but I usually let the feeling build up a bit before I utter the sentimental words. We’re just not the smooshie type of family, quite typical of Asians. But we keep in touch with regular emails and adequate Skype time (with video) so I’m a safe distance away from breaking down and saying I miss you.

My close friends? No problem. If you’re reading this and I haven’t emailed or talked to you in a while… I miss you.

Then there are those friends who I’ve lost touch with. We were close at one point, saw each other frequently then we got busy, parted our separate ways and don’t even chat online to say hello. I see their names online, it’s highlighted, I know they’re only a click away and I think to myself “at least I see their name light-up and I know their still around” What kind of thought is that? Am I waiting for something bad to happen before I hit that button on the mouse? Some of these friends I haven’t spoken to in years, and we used to drive 40min up to SFU every morning then 60 min on the way back down. Then we’d head over to each others’ house to study after dinner and have sleepovers during exams. We used to know all about each other and after so much time has past saying I miss you just feels awkward. So I won’t say those words, it just doesn’t make sense to say I miss you and I’ve seen you online so many times but I’m just too damn lazy to hit the button to start chatting with you because I’m busy surfing online on four different web pages and adding another chat session would just slow me down. But I do miss you.

Chinese Fortune Telling

2006-11-06T19:56:00.000-08:00

To all Dragons out there (born 1952, 1964, 1976, 1988) look forward to better luck next year. This year has just been the shits for me. Crap keeps happening to me, starting with my car getting broken into, (this monitor just went blank, followed by me pissing off, but now it’s ok) losing stuff left and right, CB’s car having problems after the break-in when it was under my care, the house having issues and on and on.. I was told this year would be bad for dragons, so I faithfully carried a little jade Rabbit to ward off evil and misfortune, maybe I should’ve adopted a pet rabbit instead.

The fortune has been released for next year and it looks like Dragons are going to have a 180 on their luck. This luck seems to center around relationships. If you’re single, you’ll get hitched, if you’re coupled, you’ll develop many new relationships. That’s nice to hear, but at this point I’d be happy to just recover my losses.

Double Standards

2006-11-05T10:26:00.000-08:00

Last night CB and I were a the Grand River Hot Pot on Clement. Chinese hot pot typically means you grab your food at a buffet table and bring it back to grill or boil in broth. The place smelled great but it looked like a BBQ hot box. Do those vents hanging over tables ever work? The chairs and tables were sticky, probably from fumigating in that smoke all night long. The buffet tables were a mess. With the smoke and all it looked like heaven for roaches and that's what we had for company. About 30min into our meal CB starts brushing something to the right of me. I see a 2 inch cockroach running off the edge of the table. I didn't budge and CB continues to eat. Then I leaned back a bit just incase that thing crawls up from underneath. I said it went over the edge, but it's not like it fell off the table, it's probably crawling around the underside. 5min later it crawled towards the food again, this time I waved over a waiter who pulled out his towel as he walked towards us, I pointed and he grabbed. He knew exactly why he was being called. No apologies given, instead I said thanks. Anywhere else I would have demanded our meals be taken care of and then some bitching. But I would feel almost embarrassed to even bitch at a place like this. It just seemed acceptable for crap like that to happen here.

lost items

2006-10-27T13:42:00.000-07:00

*sigh*
I think it's time to update my lost/stolen items list.

Red Roots CANADA T-shirt
TOMTOM
Rayband Sunglasses arrr.. almost had the luxury of forgetting about that one too.

ok, I can't go on with this list anymore I'm all irritated. what's pissing me off the most is that it seems like i'm losing or having things stolen from me that's particularily sentimental in nature.
Specifically things given by CB or the one incident TOMTOM that I gave him. What a friggin shitty year. I've never lost so many items in one year before.

Rachael Ray's Tasty Travels

2006-10-27T12:44:00.000-07:00

The other night I had the Food Network on TV in the background. It's pretty much my default station when there's nothing to watch or I just want background noise. I figure cooking is something I could brush up on.

Rachael Ray has several shows of her own, meals under 30min, $40 a day and probably some others that I don't know.

On Oct. 24 Rachael Ray's Tasty Travels " Rachael’s taking us on a pub crawl across the country, without washing down a lot of dough" That caught my attention! Sounds like my kind-a-gal, let's just hope she swings by San Francisco. "Rachael starts us out with a trek through the Pacific Northwest for the best in brews from Seattle, Vancouver and Portland, Oregon. Then we climb over to the Rocky Mountains and from Jackson Hole, Wyoming, to Denver, Colorado, experience some pubs with rock-bottom prices. And "pubbing" isn’t just for the west! We’re gonna get our drink on in the East Coast as we sample libations from Rhode Island to Cape Cod. And finally, where else does everybody know your name than Boston? "

Did you catch that? If you're not Canadian, you don't know what I'm trying to point out.

let's do it again..

Rachael starts us out with a trek through the Pacific Northwest for the best in brews from Seattle, Vancouver and Portland, Oregon. Then we climb over to the Rocky Mountains and from Jackson Hole, Wyoming, to Denver, Colorado, experience some pubs with rock-bottom prices. And "pubbing" isn’t just for the west! We’re gonna get our drink on in the East Coast as we sample libations from Rhode Island to Cape Cod. And finally, where else does everybody know your name than Boston?

So, she missed SF. That's fine, but she ends up hitting my hometown which IS NOT part of your country missy! Do the rest of those viewers know that? or did you expect to drive up there across the 'stateboarder' carefree as long as you carry no fruits and meats.

Lucy Mae Brown is her pub of choice in Vancouver, BC. I wasn't sure if I should be proud that we once again made a hit in an American show, or annoyed that once again, they didn't care to make the distinction that we're not part of them.

It's My Birthday

2006-10-09T13:25:00.000-07:00

some birthday statistics.

Oct. 2000
drunk after one beer then passed out completely after a smoke my friend brought back from Thailand.

Oct. 2006

Everyone thinks I did pretty lousy job but I think I did pretty well.
2 Glasses of Champagne during dinner
then starting @ 10:45pm
Kettle Soda
A shot of something sweet and good
glass of Champagne
Chilled Crown (as if the 'chill' really made a difference)
soda
Crown
Crown
12:30pm. Passed out on the couch then some bitch tried to wake me up, didn't she know it was my birthday?

That's pretty good for 2 hours!!! I'm so proud of myself.

Shiny or Dull side

2006-09-06T13:48:00.000-07:00

Aluminum Foil.

There is a shiny and dull side which occurs during the manufacturing process. Which side do YOU use? I believe the shiny side reflects heat better so to keep food warm I face the shiny side INSIDE. That's just the way I feel about it and I do it all the time! I came across some resistance to my preferred method of cooking this past weekend. Which, led to a series of loud/heavy "discussions" until we finally had access to outside knowledge....we decided to ask a Scientist but the answer was still vague.... maybe it doesn't matter, but I'm still sticking to my theory.

hello again

2006-07-18T08:03:00.000-07:00

hm.. it's been a while..

ok, here we go.. some pics of what took place in El Salvador.

I've never worked so hard in my life. I had two other chiropractic students working with me in a church. We were confined to a concrete room with one window and three fans and a 30min lunch. We start at 8am and that's the crowd that awaits us when we get there.

Morning crowd

The room was probably over 100 deg, or it felt like it. When we'd step out for lunch, the air outside would be cooler than the room, that's just wrong. By lunch time our finger nails would be black from touching so many people. yah.. EWWWW

My morning started off with Yoga, led by one of the students there. It was nice to warm up the day. Especially with the view...

I quickly lost 5 pounds in one week down there. All my meals were much smaller... it made me realize I really don't need a large chocolate cake to justify a complete meal.

I met up with my cousin Josephine there. She's in the peace corps and traveled 5 hours by bus just to meet me for the weekend. We went to the malls which had A/C in addition to other crazy stuff like Louise Vuitton, Channel then Puma and Polo selling at American dollars. I'd get a better deal up here with a sale! What the hell??? Their average monthly income is $300? I just don't get it. I could get a kick ass meal for $7, but coffee is $1.50, movie is $3.50 and I got a Tony and Guy Hair cut for $5 including tips. The prices are all over the place. Gas is over $3 how do they afford to drive? Josephine's weekend with me apparently hit deep in her pocket books. Since she's based in a more rural area, her salary is much lower.

Now, I just want to sleep. I've got nothing interesting to say about my life except to bitch about mundane issues that most people share.

I guess there is something worth mentioning. I'm searching for a GPS device for a child or tween. Something discrete, preferably an implant, is that allowed? That means cell phones, removable wrist bands any legal looking devide will not work. We want this kid located at all times. Preferably delivering an electric shock when she wonders too far from home.

El Salvador

2006-06-17T17:46:00.000-07:00

Going to El Salvador

For the first 3 years of elementary I lived in a small city in Taiwan, somewhat ghetto actually. I walked to school everyday passing the fruit lady with her fresh fruits, the metal gates of stores yet to open and this small medical clinic filled with pharmaceuticals that I could smell at 7am through closed doors. There was a homeless old man who laid by the front door every morning. I could smell him too. He wasn't thin, but just looked limp and you can see his saggy wrinkled skin through his dirty grayed T-shirt. Sometimes he would mumble and freak the shit out of me. Sometimes his shorts slid all the way up to his hips showing the most horrifying flaccid piece of "ji ji" as I called it back then. I was afraid of him and felt sorry for him and I wondered if the doctor inside does anything for the man. So, I would tell my grandma that I wanted to be a doctor. She was ecstatic. At that time I didn't understand why. Then I told her I wanted to help those poor people and she just told me to stick with the first part, “just finish studying first."

So, I finished studying. I'm not your pill doctor but I do something more hands on and I'm about to do something I've always wanted.

With finances on my mind I was hesitant at first. I started making up excuses of why I shouldn’t go. I talked to CB who asked me what I would get out of this trip. That upset me a lot. I just assumed most people would understand why 'cuz it sure as hell ain’t for the money. How do I explain why I’m taking an unpaid week off work, paying for flight and housing in El Salvador instead of Hawaii? I'm staying in a church, I have to bring my own sheets, there's no hot water (not that I'll need it) then be sweating in 80-90deg weather with no A/C and working M-F 8-5?

CRIME: The U.S. Embassy considers El Salvador a critical crime-threat country. The homicide rate in the country increased 25 percent from 2004 to 2005, and El Salvador has one of the highest homicide rates in the world. Both violent and petty crimes are prevalent throughout El Salvador, and U.S. citizens have been among the victims. Travelers should avoid carrying valuables in public places. Passports and other important documents should not be left in private vehicles. Armed assaults and carjackings take place both in San Salvador and in the interior of the country, but are especially frequent on roads outside the capital where police patrols are scarce. Criminals have been known to follow travelers from the international airport to private residences or secluded stretches of road where they carry out assaults and robberies. Armed robbers are known to shoot if the vehicle does not come to a stop. Criminals often become violent quickly, especially when victims fail to cooperate immediately in surrendering valuables. Frequently, victims who argue with assailants or refuse to give up their valuables are shot.

Ok, so i'm only spending one week there and it's not like I"m Angelina Jolie pulling babies out of 3rd world countries. Besides, my cousin Josephine is in the Peace Corps located in El Salvador too. She's been there for a year already...I haven't seen her in years, so it will be very nice getting to see her again.

What I"m looking forward to: Seeing Jose, going to the beach :), site seeing, hopefully performing miracles with stories to bring home, eating.... I love trying local foods when I travel.. hopefully I won't get a case of Monteczuma's Revenge. And returning safely with minimal mosquito bites or gun wounds.

Western Caribbean

2006-05-22T13:34:00.000-07:00

First night, our welcome parade in the promenade. It was neat to see them manage to throw a parade in such tight space, but it was also kinda cheesy.

First stop: Labadee, Haiti

Sea Kayaking, visiting the village of Labadee. It was kind of sad visiting this small worn down fishing village. Our guide informed us that they fish all day long because the size of the fishes they catch are no bigger than 3-4 inches long. All the big fishes are gone.

Formal dinner night on RCCL. We have the same waiter every night, Sydney (far left), who had to put up with a lot of shit to please our table. My aunts and uncle sat with us and their lack of English created havoc every night. They got upset over wrong orders, as if it was Sydney's fault, calling him several times to change orders. But Sydney kept a smile every night and eventually the aunty's started to like him. They thought he was so cute with his big eyes so they'd call him over repeatedly to chat with him instead of harassing him. And I get to do the translation while eating dinner.. yippee. I switched seats after the 3rd night.

ROOM SERVICE
The service on RCCL is impeccable. Our rooms are made every time we step out of the cabin. It's as if our stateroom attendant peeped out everytime we accessed the room to clean it after we leave. I've never had to use the same towel twice! We liked the animals they folded for us at night.

Second stop: Ocho Rios, Jamaica

After hiking up a waterfall for an hour we enjoyed a local Jamaican jerk chicken at Mama Marley's.

That's my uncle sampling a cup of Jamaica's famous Blue Mountain coffee. This was my dad's highlight! He bought 16lbs of coffee, CB bought about 9lbs, our whole group walked out with about 50lbs of Blue Mountain!

The down side of the trip was the storm that hit Grand Cayman, which raised the water levels at the port. Ships were not allowed to dock so we missed Grand Cayman and my sister had to reorganize her wedding to take place on the ship insteadWe were all disappointed, but the wedding pulled through and as Peter (my brother in law) said "life is full of unexpected surprises and Brenda and I will take care of each other through any unexpected events.” How sweet.

I've been asked if my sisters and I look alike. I'll let you decide.

The highlight of my trip was Cozumel.

We woke up early to go Power snorkeling!

Then we arrived at Playa Mia around 3pm. Half an hour later all the tourists were called back to the shuttle for transportation back to their ships (RCCL and Carnival). Since my sister, CB and I arrived on our own we stayed behind and the beach became very quite with only a few people left. I passed out for a few minutes and when I opened my eyes I found myself floating far from shore, it was the most amazing feeling. Then I started to get spooked because I WAS all alone in the water. I quickly paddled my way back to shore. All the dark areas under the water seem to be creeping up towards me...

This was CB's favourite table.

This poker table automatically takes a percentage of the pot everytime it deals a hand. I think it's 3%. So the pot could be $300, but you only take home $100 after all the "self tipping" is accounted for

Other onboard entertainment.. ice skating

Final Stop: South Beach, Miami

(picture of miami from our ship)The people are so much better looking over there. The guys are HOT. I'd go back there to party again. CB and I ended up at The Mansion
It was nice to step into a club where people dressed up and didn't have guts hanging out. It was also nice throughout the entire trip to get drunk and be able to walk back to our cabin/ hotel.

Cruisin'

2006-05-12T23:49:00.000-07:00

My sister's getting married at Grand Cayman next week and it's all happening on a cruise.

One week on The Navigator of the Seas with Royal Caribbean Cruise Line.

Ship Facts for Navigator of the Seas
Maiden Voyage: December 14, 2002
Passenger Capacity: 3,114
Godmother: Steffi Graf
Gross Tonnage: 138,000
Length: 1020'
Max Beam: 157.5'
Draft: 29'
Cruising Speed: 23.7 knots

Destinations: Labadee, Ocho Rios, Grand Cayman, Cozumel.